Hello Lovely Humans!!!!! I hope you have all continued to be, well, lovely. (: I have had a lot going on in my life recently, new opportunities and schedules, new adjustment periods of my life, and honestly I did end up having to put this website on the back burner a little bit. But I am determined now to get it up and running again, and to update you all on what I have been up to. This is what inspired me to make this post, about why I am doing the "crazy" thing, but working a job in New York City at the same time as living all the way in west New Jersey.
Now, I know what you are probably all thinking...New Jersey isn't THAT FAR AWAY from New York. You're right, it isn't! Is an hour and 40 minute bus ride multiple times a week (both ways, so make that almost 4 hours to be exact), a fun time? Not at all. Do people I talk to here look at me like I'm a tiny bit insane. Quite often. But besides the fact that I am definitely quirky in my own ways, working in NYC steadily before having a place to live here may by far be the craziest move I've made yet. But honestly, it really has made me realize SO MANY THINGS so far, and I would like to share them with you today. So here is why I am currently, the "Crazy Commuter Girl", and why I actually in a way...kind of love it.
I have a TINY piece of one of my Life Dreams
I'm putting Life Dreams in capital letters for a reason! We all have these things we've imagined for ourselves our whole lives, maybe even starting from a young age for some of us. These "Life Dreams" are the places we always imagine ourselves ideally ending up or achievements we imagine ourselves making to live our most fulfilling version of our lives. One of mine has always been living in and having a job in NYC, preferably one of a creative and artistic nature. But I never had any one specific job pin-pointed exactly in my mind. I have a million things I'm passionate about, singing, video blogging, acting, writing, creating art in general....but one thing I always knew was that I just saw myself BEING here. So yes, who knows where my journey will lead me, but for right now I do get to be here. I get to come to the city I've always imagined myself in for work at an actual job, and that little piece of achieving my Life Dream is enough to make the commute and occasional fatigue worth it.
LIGHT ENERGY TIP: Make a list of your Life Dreams, and start to become aware of which of them you have already achieved, or are coming close to! If you feel you haven't yet, start with a game plan, one time step at a time. Because that's how all good plans work. The tiny steps matter!
I'm more appreciate of the new exposure to experiences
I of course was working quite steadily with multiple jobs before I had my first city experience with my internship. The jobs I had at home I cared about and still do, (I'm still a music teacher and give private lessons in New Jersey once a week which I LOVE), but being in a new place has made me more aware of and appreciate of my surroundings. Even when I am reminded of the fact that yes, maybe I am a little overly ambitious and a bit "crazy"to be working here on the regular with no place yet to call home, I wouldn't get to see the sights here, meet the people, and even just hear the sounds. New York is exciting to me, and there is always something new to discover here each day. That isn't something that I find myself stumbling upon very often back in my hometown, being a girl who comes from a very suburban, more "country-style, laid back" hometown. So once again, the access to these new experiences is my second reminder that it's worth it.
LIGHT ENERGY TIP: Compare your current situations to your situations in the past. What is in your life now that you can be more appreciative of? Look around you and take note of those things, because many times we don't realize right away that they are there.
For example, if I didn't have my first opportunity to start making my way into the city with my internship, I would have never seen these cute little shops in Union Square, where one day I randomly browsed and met some cool artists and found inspiration. OR I wouldn't have found one of my favorite go to coffee shops in the Union Square area. :)
By the way, this spot, "Le Cafe Coffee" literally makes the best americano I've had so far in the city. And I've been exploring! Check them out , right in Union Square.
I know I'm climbing a ladder and I'm in a "hustling" period right now.
We've ALL been there, lovely humans. We all have periods in our lives where we have to hustle a little bit to get to our goals and what we want. I've been through many. The high school into college period where I was well...hustling to simply make good choices and learn to take care of myself, stand up for myself and be a confident person. The college period where I was hustling to get through school, figure out what I wanted my focus to be, and keep on track until graduation...And trust me, was is the hustle (a full 6 year one!). But because of those past points in my life I know that now is yet another period just like those. Yes, I'm overly tired. Yes, I'm trying to LEARN how the city works and I'm doing it alone. And for someone with no family or close friends who live here...I'm not going to lie, it's a little scary! (More on that later). But I know that every step I've taken has lead to me being here right now. And for whatever reason that was meant to be, and long periods of hard work and struggling to make things work out sometimes are necessary for the big reward in the end. I felt that when I graduated college, and this is just another time where I have to work hard to feel that again.
LIGHT ENERGY TIP: It's human nature that there are going to be times in your life where life feels "easy breezy" and where life feels like you're hiking up a rocky mountain. When you're going up that mountain...what's on the other side for you? There is something there, and I know this for a fact, because all the periods in our lives when we work hard it's not to stand in one place. Keep climbing that mountain lovely humans, just remember what's potentially over it!
At first I was scared and excited. Sometimes I'm still scared, but I constantly feel more knowledgable.
Listen guys, like I mentioned, I do NOT come from a city family or background. The most I have been exposed to that lifestyle was through auditions where usually I had someone come with me because I was too afraid to go alone, or visiting friends who would meet me somewhere. The idea of navigating New York by myself was terrifying because it all just seems...so huge. And in a way, it is! My first day, I actually took a "practice trip" in, to plan exactly what subway I would take and where my internship would be so I didn't get lost. Now, some of you might actually think that's smart. I mean, it wasn't a DUMB idea. It helped a lot! But I was so afraid of making a mistake or something going wrong. The bottom line is, over time it became easier until I was able to travel in a relaxed state of mind, similar to how I traveled from campus to campus when I was studying in college.
Eventually I got my first paying job which I have now, and I had to learn how to get to a different part of the city. But from my experience using the subway system regularly for my internship prior, I actually didn't feel quite AS scared. My point is, that each little baby step feels scary, but each is actually a little easier than the last. Each gives you at thicker skin, a broader mind and a higher sense of self trust. This is maybe the most important thing I've learned since journey-ing out here...is that life is kind like a constant layering on of evolving and advancing, and the only thing standing in the way of that is FEAR and INSECURITY. That's what I'm trying to stop us all from having with these blogs and videos anyway!
Where I work now, in Upper East Side, New York.
LIGHT ENERGY TIP: I'm actually just going to state a fact here, because this is SO IMPORTANT. There is NOTHING you can't do on your own. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Anything you want, you are capable of making happen and strong and smart enough to figure how to do so.
All in all, I'm tired and over joyed.
It's always hard to make a major life change. It's draining, nerve wracking, and unpredictable! But the big picture as I always say, is what we really need to keep in mind the most. I'm doing one of the things I've dreamt of since I was a little girl. So even though it isn't always super east and comfortable all the time, I feel so lucky and proud that it's my reality right now. I think going after your crazy dreams is more worth all of the ups and downs in the long run, rather than making a safe and comfortable choice that isn't what you REALLY want. So ask yourselves lovely humans....what DO you want for your life? Do you have even the smallest inkling of an idea? If so....what's stopping you? Who is stopping you? No one, but yourself.
Stay lovely,
Kelly
:)
Some highlights of my city journey so far.....
Here I am on my second day going into my internship. I was so excited and definitely got overly dressed up the first two days. That was...before the fatigue maybe?
This day I explored a bit after my internship, and got lost in Union Square. I was EXTREMELY exhausted on this day. It was honestly pretty bad. I just kept walking because I missed walking around listening to music, and pretty soon I didn't realize how far I actually ended up going. So I had to re-trace my steps and go all the way backwards. I did however stumble into this cute pop-up shop and bought some lip balm and a new lipstick spontaneously since my lips were really dry. Then my day ended by getting gloriously "pranked" by some guy running around with a microphone screaming in people's faces with his friend filming it, obviously probably for some viral video type of project. Who knows, but hey, "Welcome to New York" I guess.
One of the last weeks of my internship, and just about to start my new job! I was more comfortable at this point and feeling less nervous excited but more adjusted to the city commute and the subway system. Until next time loves!!!!
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